What No One Ever Told Me about Post-Partum pt1

[Disclaimer: I do not have PPD. I am good. I love being a mom. I'm aware just how lucky I am. Really.]

As soon as my son was born people were already clamoring for him to have a brother or sister. And while I don't blame them (he's so cute!!) this is my letter to myself about all the things I hate about post-partum life. In fact it's much worse than the dreaded third trimester. I'm not writing this to complain, but because NOBODY told me this. And I feel like I need to say something.

So here's part 1.

PAIN.

I know you're thinking, um DUH, your body just created a bagel sized opening where there was none before and pushed a HUMAN BEING out of yourself. Of course you're going to hurt. But I was still not prepared for the post-partum pain, especially not lasting as long as it did.

I suppose my first clue should have been when the local anesthesia wore off and I could still feel the midwife stitching me back together. Needle going in and out, in and out...does it normally take this long? Now every movement for the next 6 weeks is a reminder of the carnage down there or an anxiety-inducing "ohmygoodness did I just pull or rip a stitch?" moment. I expected this for maybe a week or two. But no. (and fun fact, 8 weeks out and I'm still having not-so-fun follow-up appts at the doctor).

Getting in and out of the bed, scooting to sit up when being roused by a screaming hungry baby, trying to lift myself off of the couch - these things are near impossible with low back and tailbone pain. Like burst-into-tears, I-guess-I'll-just-live-here-now-because-I-can't-move thoughts. Weighing the worth of sitting in that chair or getting in te rAnd I didn't even break my tailbone like many women do! My low back is still quite angry, making that handy-dandy Ergo that distributes baby's weight equally on the shoulders and low back a no-go. So much for baby wearing. Now everything is done one-handed (or not at all).

Joint pain. What the heck! After having my fingers and feet swell to the size of sausages during my 3rd trimester, I did not expect my knuckles to be like little grapes in the middle of my hands post-partum. But ow did my hands hurt those first few weeks!

Muscles. Unless you're used to carrying around a sack of limp and wiggly sack of potatoes all day and all night, clutching it to your chest and bouncing for what feels like hours, your probably going to use muscles you haven't in a while. I expected this, but I don't think this list is complete without a mention of it.